•November 28, 2014 • 2 Comments

Where do I even begin…

Anna. Suzy. Alyona. Dion. Radhive. Amma. Nikita. Radhive. Radu. Taisa. Maneka. Nishan. Thaaththa. Ashini. Sakhitha. Volha. Anuki. Neema. Shenalee. Arzy. Rashfa. Fara.

A list of the recently contacted people on Whatsapp & Viber. Friends. Family. Without who life would be utterly and completely useless. Thank you.

Sri Lanka. Qatar. Georgia. Maldives.

Countries I visited in the last 6 months. Thank you.

Airbus A380. Boeing 787. Qatar Airways. EASA Exams.

Career milestones. Thank you.

Awesome apartment. Easy work. Never ending leave. New places/New faces. Food on the table. Drinks to go. Hands to hold. Stories to tell. Big dreams. Exciting days. Blissful nights. Slow soft kisses. Warm Ocean waves. Cool winter breezes. Coffee in the park. more tech-gadgets than I know what to do with. Epic coworkers. Unlimited internet access Smile with tongue out Health. Wealth. Happiness in lovely little doses. Life itself. Someone to love. Friends (once again) (Special mention Anna) Safety. Security. that feeling of freedom you have when you KNOW everything is working out as planned and everything is fine. A nice big bank account (Big enough for little old me at least) the comfiest bed everrrrr which I shall crash on to in less than 15 minutes…

If that isn’t something to be thankful about, I don’t know what is. Thank you. For this glorious fraction in time that is my life…it is a blessing. Happy thanksgiving everyone. Count your blessings.

Someday is yesterday.

•August 6, 2014 • 2 Comments

I knew her voice before she spoke. I could hear her whisper my name in a crowded sea of people. I saw the light in her eyes in the darkest of nights, and watched shadows fall across her face seated under those massive ancient trees you find shelter beneath during warm summer days

Life has a strange way of sneaking up on you and quietly taking from you the few things you swore to hold on to, Like the waves washing away silly hearts you drew in the sand together. It isn’t always sudden and gut wrenching; It isn’t blatant and abrupt. it is gradual, unnoticeable, gentle even…

Are we all that naïve? Does everyone at that age believe in happy endings and together forever? I guess so. if not I suppose I wouldn’t be staring at these wedding pictures like a dumbstruck idiot. This is not the ending I envisioned. But it is an ending nevertheless. A bittersweet ending and a blissful beginning. Perspective I suppose.

She once asked me if I knew what happiness was…I replied I wasn’t quite sure. She told me that happiness was a lie!!! Profound. Jaded. And perhaps (sadly) true! Strange that we know that nothing is forever and yet we strive to be happy in almost every action we do…

I remember the happiest moment we shared together. A gloomy windy night, curled up together watching “One Tree Hill” I distinctly remember it was Season 9, Episode 13…both “Unlucky” numbers and I thought to myself how terrible it was that such a blissful moment would coincide with such inauspicious numbers…However I do recall, with infinite fondness the following quote…and 10 years after…It suddenly makes sense…

"It’s the oldest story in the world. One day you’re 17 and planning for someday. And then quietly, and without you ever really noticing, someday is today, and someday is yesterday, and this is your life."

If only we knew back then where we’d stand right now…would we have made the choices we did? I hope so. After all…its not half bad, the lives we’ve made for ourselves.


•December 10, 2013 • 2 Comments

Its been more than a year since I sat down and blogged about anything. I have dozens of unfinished drafts but not one single post that I have completed. My tiny fan base occasionally confronts me as to why I haven’t written anything and my excuse is simply that “I do not have the time” which is true enough in a certain sense, but more than that’s its far easier to explain than replying with the truth which is “I am uninspired”

My life has been good, to say the least, and my job has played a pivotal part in the happiness. It helps that I absolutely love my job, but today of all days I feel particularly blessed. and I’d like to share with you…my million imaginary readers, why exactly.

A year ago I was drifting on the blissful clear waters of the Maldives. Unchallenged, lazy, But content. Easy work days, Resorts and snorkeling during off days. Life was laid back and lovely! Today I am in Qatar, working for one of the most prestigious airlines in the world. Admittedly I love the bragging rights that come with working for an airline of this caliber, and the fleet is to DIE for! I have learnt SO much in these few months and I can literally feel my career growing towards my ultimate (short term) goal. And this is an awesome feeling. But not truly inspiring. Which is possibly the reason this post didn’t write itself 10 months ago when I came to Doha.

Doha in itself is yet to impress me. It is a young city and one just wiping itself clean of the sticky,messy, afterbirth! The modern Dubai like skyline is harshly ruined by old dusty eyesore buildings surrounding it. The lifestyle is torn between being a party paradise and an overly conservative society! People are varied and from different backgrounds but are still strangely disconnected and come off as largely impolite, majorly rude. But it does have its hidden little charms. Like Souq waqif where you can try out sheesha and catch up on a bit of the touristy culture. Or go for a desert drive or dune bashing as its called here…But this too is nothing note worthy. I spend my days watching box office movies at City Centre and trying out the hundreds of restaurants there for your picking…But as before this is by far anything but inspiring!!!

But after some pondering and some day long sobering up, I have come to realize that my happiness in life has never really ever been about the place I’ve been. I’m pretty sure you could drop me to the bottom of a well and if I had what I wanted…I’d be happy down there. Blissful. Ignorant. But happy.

People always ask me “How do you live away from Lanka so long”, “The Maldives is so boring…what did you DO in Male’ for three long years” , and since of late “OMG Qatar is just a desert isnt it”? Yes Male’ was boring, Yes Doha is essentially just a desert…but it was never about the place…It was ALWAYS about the people.

A few hours of loitering about my apartment and a huge hangover later…I am inspired enough to sit myself down and write about it. not to please you, my imaginary fan base, But for me to find many years from now, Read, and relive this feeling. Relish the moment gone by. To reminisce.

Doha is home because of my colleagues. My dysfunctional, Multi cultural, Absolutely stark-raving-mad bunch of people I work with. Yes of course we have the random asshole, but for a large part they make my work days just that much more entertaining. It is a pleasure to work with people smarter than you and to gain something for yourself by simply working beside someone. Work is not work if you enjoy it and with this lot that holds true!

Doha is home because of the A319. A320. A321. A330. A340. B777, B787 and in Jan the mammoth A380…because if there is anything that makes me feel at home, its sitting in, on top of, or under a plane doing what I love!

Doha is home because of “Skinny” who cooks for me and takes care of me and is eternally emptying my fridge for me! Smile with tongue out She is my childhood friend who was lost, now found and she is my link to the social world of clubbing and late nights and pretty girls! She is my unwilling wing-woman and my stable drinking partner. She is a true friend and one I am glad to call one of my own.

Doha is home because of Pretty V and my Blue eyed beauty and Tess and Anna and Sue. Nothing is more soothing than to curl up next to V, hold her hand and live in the moment. It is love. simple. sweet. satisfying. I will do nothing to complicate it and neither will she and together I shall remain happily by her side, knowing that I will always have a hand to hold or a shoulder to rest on when that’s what I truly need. My blue eyed Mila is my constant crush and dance floor addict. Without her, nights out are quiet and mellow…with her they are a blurry dancy riot…and that’s always a good thing! Tess and Anna add to the fun, Tess with her sharp strong ways and Anna with her absolute wit and charm and radiance!!! And last but not least Sue…who I apparently followed from the Maldives to Qatar to be with!

This is what makes Qatar what it is. Its not the Buildings or the views or the promise of a metropolis! It is the people who matter. the ones you love. the families we merge into.

Life is hard. Everywhere I look I am reminded of this. Relatives die. Cost of living soars, It never seems to get easier. Everyday is a uphill climb, everyday you lose something or someone. every second is one less moment of your finite life…and that is scary. unsettling.

But every once in a while, life gives you a break. A tough job completed on time at work, and a pat on the back. Or a few hours spent searching for shooting stars with someone who you truly love, quiet evenings at home watching movies or eating junk food with childhood friends, a night out dancing till your feet are sore, loud drunk parties, watching the sunset where the desert meets the sea, and suddenly…You are thankful. Thankful for the love people bestow upon you. Thankful for the hand to hold or the tight hugs that follow. Thankful to have been blessed with the opportunity to be here. now. with these people who you didn’t know existed a few months ago!!! it is truly amazing!!! I firmly believe that to be happy you need to count your blessings…mine are infinite and unending. and it brings me to tears. who do I thank? why do I deserve this bliss which is mine? The answers will always elude me.

I am inspired. And I hope someday the people who inspire me read this and know that you are the reason I am the eternally smiling Kaiser. Without you my life would be colourless. Without you I would be a desert.

How to fix a plane–By Kaiser Kobayashi.

•September 25, 2012 • Leave a Comment

Modern aircraft are engineering marvels employing the most up to date technology available to human beings (Excluding those secretive bitches at Area 51) These systems include fly-by-wire, fully powered control surfaces, digitally/electronically controlled ultra efficient engines, and advanced auto pilots which let real pilots get laid in-flight-in-the-cockpit while the plane flies to your destination. (Yes…airhostesses are dumb-sluts and it happens ALL the time) But getting back to the point…maintenance of these complex machines require highly skilled, dedicated, pure genius individuals like myself to ensure all systems are fully functional, operational, and available during the duration of the flight.

Aircraft maintenance engineers study for 2 years continuously with no sleep OR food in order to pass exams given to us by aliens who flew from LV-426 to earth (hence being the supreme-est flying beings known to us) and upon passing these exams which you mere mortals cant even imagine of getting through we are considered “suitable” to maintain the “airworthiness” of your planes. Maintenance can be broadly seen as carrying out checks, tests, and inspections of the one trillion systems available onboard to ensure that they function as required and if not are fixed, or are in an acceptable state (wont explode, fall off, melt) during the next flight. We employ many manuals to determine these things. AMM or Aircraft Maintenance Manuals which contain all the data needed to carry out maintenance on a plane. MEL or Minimum equipment lists which detail the minimum requirements needed to carry out a particular flight, CDL or Configuration deviation List which basically tells you which parts of the plane are allowed to fall off or be missing completely during flight and so on and so forth.

In addition to the above mentioned data we use many other alternate methods based on experience and industry based knowledge. One of the most widely used methods is the Rock-Paper-Scissor method which is extremely popular among airlines these days. To employ this method you need 3 senior engineers locked up in a conference room…using this method they can determine the most appropriate course of action to dispatch a crippled aircraft. The exact details of this method are a closely guarded secret but it involves meticulous troubleshooting skills and is used only by the most experienced personnel employed within an airline.

Another popular method used in the cockpit is the voice-command-based instruction set. in this procedure the cockpit is cleared of all unwanted, non-essential personnel and the engineer reads out a variable list of commands to reset computers and systems using the cockpit voice recorder interface. Commands include “Reset you fucking piece of shit”, “fucking-shit-piece computer WORK dammit”, and even some customer specific commands which can be programmed in ones local language, eg: “vesigey pariganakaya reset veyallah” (Translation: prostitutes computer reset NOW)

For external components such as engines, landing gears, and control surface actuators, mechanical maintenance methods can be used. Violent blows with a hammer or other hard objects, kicking or shaking violently coupled with above voice based commands can be used. In extreme cases the self-fixing-method can be used, whereby a component is thrown on the concrete ground or against a wall in an attempt to let the component fix itself using the energy imparted by the velocity suddenly becoming zero upon reaching the floor/wall.  However this method is highly dangerous and requires an industry expert to be executed.

Minor faults can be cleared using circuit breaker resetting; Each system has a related electrical circuit breaker which resets that particular system, resetting this causes the computer to “reboot” thereby clearing spurious warnings. If this method fails one can reset many CB’s across many systems thereby confusing the computers and causing them to revert into “WTF-Mode” which in most cases clears all faults AND prevents any other faults from being displayed until the plane is airborne after which it’s the pilots problem and engineering is vindicated.

However like all things nothing is 100% and the chances are something very VERY important can always fail in flight in which case you have a few minutes to use a reliable pencil to write down a small note to a loved one (which they probably wont get). But know that in your fiery fall to doom it was all your fault. Given the reliability of simple household items such as hair dryers, microwave ovens, and personal computers, you DECIDING to fly was a phenomenal flaw on your part and hence your personal lapse in judgment led to your demise. You have been warned. You have seen the signs, the writing on the wall…the rest is up to you. Ayubowan. *evil grin*

Forever 24?

•July 30, 2012 • 1 Comment

“The only constant in life is change”…Einstein said that. When you think about it, its completely true…People change, for better, for worse; Your environment is constantly morphing around you, even you are constantly undergoing metamorphosis! But more often than not we tend not to notice these changes, they play along and we accept them as normal. Friends come and go, People grow up and move away, Governments and policies change…Like a glacier in constant motion we trudge along, oblivious to everything around us. Numb to the little things in life. Until something abrupt and sudden jarringly forces you to acknowledge the life you take for granted.

My Sunday nights are usually spent hanging out till late at this suave little café’ called “Oxygen”. It’s this cozy dim lit place in the Maldives, with a partial view of the sea and the airport, with square wooden tables and colourful cushioned couches. We had a “regular” spot with seating for three. We would meet up at 10pm and have mocktail mojitos and Oreo cheesecake till the early hours of the morning and go home feeling dazed and drowsy coz our bodies were begging for sleep! We have no proper “Hellos”… you just pull out a chair, seat yourself and start talking…Conversation was random and aimless and usually consisted of us bitching about work or life or each other! Free wifi ensured we updated our Facebook check-in and showed each other pictures of places and faces on our phones. The night ends with a casual goodbye and mocking comment and we all go our separate ways…this was the routine. Normality.

I think back on those hundreds of outings and it breaks my heart. There is SO much I would have done differently, so much I SHOULD have done differently but its not in our nature to appreciate till something is gone. Our hellos should have included a hug, our conversation should have been about each other and how much we valued the company and kind words in times of need. If I could go back I’d tell you that it was friends like you that made living in the Maldives away from family and old friends worthwhile. that you ease the pain and make life a lot less lonely. I would have told you how pretty you looked and how much I adored your bratty giggles and snide comments! I would have hugged you tight and said I love you when saying goodnight, if only I had known…

I think back on things and I cant recall the way you looked the last time I saw you, when things were normal…and it kills me that the last image of you is one of you hooked up to a machine, with tape on your eyelids and tubes all over you. Its just not right. I cant believe we don’t have a picture together….just you and I…doing a goofy pose or whatever! How the fuck did we not take ONE picture together? were we in that much of a hurry that we couldn’t find a split second to take a snap together? Strange. Annoying. Heartbreaking. Its still all a blur, one confusing mess with no proper answers. fever, coma, liver failure…it makes no sense. but then again why bother. Our story ended just as soon as it started.

Today would have been your 25th birthday if I’m not mistaken. I don’t even know that for sure. And if you were here I’m sure we would have gone for one of our late night coffees since its my off day and all. We would have laughed and screamed and bugged each other and ate till we couldn’t breathe…yes…that’s exactly what we would have done! There would have been chocolate cake and maybe a tiny gift to mark the occasion! But now it’ll just be a quiet lonely evening. Empty. Cold.

Life is not fair. This is the prime example of that. But in dying you have taught me SO much. I swear I’ll live my life just that much better knowing that nothing is forever and that I too once took SO much for granted! Never again. Never! Strange that your last words to me were to “be nice” as if you knew it would have some profound impact on me!!!! These little things are what keep me up at night, questioning. lingering!

Happy Birthday my sweet sweet Arafa. May angels lead you in and may you be forever 24…radiant. full of light and goodness and kindness far beyond that of a us normal people! I miss you SO much…